I am now 10 days away from being back in Kona starting Discipleship Bible School!! XD I can't believe how fast the time has flown by, It feels like I was just applying for this school a month ago. It still doesn't feel %100 real, and I know that it won't until I'm sitting on the plane. Still, I can't help but look forward to being back on the YWAM base surrounded by old and future friends chasing God's heart together!!
At the same time, it is very surreal to be leaving home again. It has been 2 years since I completed my last school with YWAM. I have grown and changed a lot as I've waited on the Lord and followed His guidance. He has taught me many lessons here that have shaped who I am, how I think, what I want, and how I see my walk with Him. Every season in life has given me unique lessons and helped me mature bit by bit, and I am thankful for each of those pieces; even the ones that have come in times and places of hurt and frustration. That being said, I'm not really sure what is on the horizon for me and where the next lessons may be found. I intend on pouring all my energy into studying God's word for the next 3 months, which I already know will be a blessing and an asset beyond comparison. I will also spend that time listening to God's voice for direction, as there are so many possibilities from this point. I have so many passions and opportunities in front of me, it seems impossible to choose just one. I am trusting and praying that God will direct the gifts He has placed in me and the passions He has placed on my heart. At each step in my journey, He has opened the right doors and shown me which way to go - even if that was not the direction I wanted to take - and I know that He will continue to do so as I seek His will for my life. I have been recently flourishing in my art, which I plan on continuing to use both in worship and in school. I have always had a love for the written word and desire to continue to write stories as God puts them on my heart. I have a deep love for missions and for Israel in particular, and have been learning Hebrew with the goal of going back there someday in whatever capacity God brings me to. I have also been given some amazing opportunities for work here in California that I would love to explore further and see what God has for me to do in these spheres. None of them really connect, but I know that God has a purpose for each of these gifts He has put on my heart. What this all has to do with DBS, I'm not really sure. It's just what came out when I started typing. =) What I do know is that I am surrounded by people that I love and that love me, and I am so incredibly blessed by all of you who are in my life! I am excited to see people in Kona that I haven't seen in a long time, and I am sad to leave friends and family here at home. I am also blessed by my friends and supporters from other places that I rarely get to see at all. I have been surrounded by such a great cloud of saints in Christ, and I know each one of you is an answer to prayer and a gift from God. Your prayers, encouragement, and generosity have helped me every step of the way. I could not have come this far without them. Even though I will sadly not be going to another country on this trip, I will still be in need of your prayers as I plunge into probably the heaviest load of homework I have ever had to tackle in my life. It is an incredible program that I have heard is very challenging. I want to get everything I can out of it, and I know I will need God's help to make it through. I also have some good news! I have saved/raised/been given almost everything I need for this school! I am down to the last $1,000 for my school fees and then I will be covered completely. I am always blown away by how God provides, and I have no doubts that He will bring in every penny that I need just when I need it. I am so grateful to everyone who has given me donations and bought my paintings to help me raise these funds, and I know God has even more provision in store that I do not yet know about. If you would like to be a part of my support team, please let me know! =) You can send me checks to 5338 Vista Grande Dr. Santa Rosa, CA 95403 or PayPal me directly to [email protected]
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I didn't post much about my uncle's death on facebook mostly because it was just so sudden and we were all caught off guard by it. I process very internally, so it's taken me a little while to be able to share about it like this.
My grandpa's death was also very short notice, but we at least got a chance to get mentally prepared for his passing. My uncle Jeff, on the other hand, had a sudden brain aneurysm that nobody saw coming. To make things even more shocking, the aneurysm was not what killed him. It was a miracle that he was in a public place in a large city (not where he lived) and was given immediate medical attention. They rushed him to a fantastic hospital in Reno and he was getting the care he needed. That event alone shocked our entire family, and we all pulled together to support him and each other. My dad and I were blessed to be able to visit him in the hospital, and he was making a lot of progress. He was weak, but talking and joking around like himself. He still had a lot of healing to go, but he was steadily moving in the right direction, so we all had hope and let our guard down. That's when a blood clot hit his heart and he died. I am so grateful that I got to see him one last time. I still can't believe he's gone. There's been a lot of loss in our family, so I am unfortunately not foreign to the grieving process, but this one hit us all harder than we expected. Last weekend, we all went out to a little town in the middle of nowhere called Lone Pine where our family is from. It holds some of my favorite childhood memories, and it was wonderful to go back there again, but the nostalgia was bitter sweet. We tried to enjoy the family reunion as best we could, but everyone was admittedly on edge. The service was simple and well done. My parents both shared and even Jeff's most redneck friends seemed to appreciate it. It was a fitting tribute to his life and how well he loved us all. <3 I don't cry very easily - ever - but I was actually able to open up and let my emotions out a bit, which helped a lot. My comfort is knowing that he is with Jesus now and having a great time kicking back and swapping stories with God. He didn't talk about his faith a lot, but he loved unconditionally and truly cared about people with God's heart. He was so thoughtful and kind, and always a lot of fun to hang out with. We are blessed to have had him in our lives and will miss him terribly! It was not a very uplifting way to end August, and I have to say that it was a terrible birthday present!! But at the same time, I know that God is still here. Life goes on and there is joy and beauty mixed in, even alongside the pain. Yes, we are all hurting, but we are also given the opportunity to love and be patient with each other through it. And I have to say that it's the small but thoughtful gestures that speak the loudest. These are the moments that make new memories - things like going through old pictures together or playing cards on the floor for no reason - just being together. Love is to be celebrated. It is love that we are mourning and love that is bringing us closer together. Love spans the long distances and doesn't care how long it is until I see my cousins again. Or until I see my uncle again. <3 |
ErikaJeremiah 29:11 Archives
March 2023
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