God is incredible! He gives me exactly what I need when I need it...no sooner.
I just got back to Kona after taking a VERY needed week and a half at home. The memorial service for my grandpa was wonderful and the funeral hit me HARD, but both brought me unimaginable closure. Going into it, I was so frazzled and worn out that I was a nervous breakdown waiting to happen. I cried a lot and was immeasurably blessed to have my friends and family around me. After that, I was fine. Well, fine is a loose term, but so much better than I have been in a long time! Spending time at home was exactly what the doctor ordered! I was able to relax, talk, cry, and genuinely have fun. All things I'd been missing for too long. It's amazing what affect home has on you. In getting ready to go back to Kona, I was a little worried that I might not be ready to go back...there is still a LOT to be processed. But my last few days home could not have been more perfect and the flight here was peaceful. I woke up with an incredible sense of peace in my heart - uncharacteristically so - and spent the 5 hour flight listening to worship music, reading my Bible, and journalling like a mad woman. No stress, no tension, and no break downs. =) Praise God!!! I am still not out of the woods yet, but I'm taking it one day at a time. God provides exactly what I need in the moment that I need it, and He is teaching me how to lean on Him in the here-and-now. I am the type of person who likes to have everything planned out and stable ahead of time, but it seems God has a different idea for this season of my life. I am being stretched and even though it is uncomfortable, I know it is so good! I am growing closer to Him in everything that gets thrown my way and it is all so worth it! "The LORD is my rock, my fortress, and my deliverer; my God is my rock, in whom I take refuge, my shield and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold." <3 (Psalm 18:2)
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March 2023
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